Radiant (Valos of Sonhadra Book 5) Read online

It was the least she could do. Before he answered her, she turned around and went to the water. His heavy steps snapped the fallen branches but she refused to look, knowing he moved to Quist’s side. Yahiro didn’t want to thank him. She didn’t want to look at him. Instead, she wanted Quist to get better so he could pick her up and fly her somewhere far away.

  She frowned as she cupped the water and drank, her face a distorted reflection on its surface. Where would she and Quist go? She knew next to nothing about Sonhadra and what she did know, the broken ship and inmates, she wanted nothing to do with.

  As far as I know... Yahiro didn’t want to finish the thought. She clenched her eyes shut but couldn’t stop herself. As far as I know, he could’ve taken me straight to him. Sundamar. Even now she could feel him watching her.

  Several phena swam by and her stomach growled, promptly reminding her that she was a mortal and on borrowed time.

  A shadow appeared at her side.

  “Are you okay, pale one?”

  Yahiro ignored him and the way his voice sang a melody through her ears, choosing to splash the sweat and grime off her face. She moved to stand and his hand wrapped around her upper arm. She tore it from his grip.

  “Don’t touch me!”

  She went back to Quist’s side and placed a soft kiss on his lips. “I’ll be right back. Don’t wake up without me.”

  Without looking back at the other alien, she made her way down the stream until she was back beneath the forest shadows and got to work.

  SUNDAMAR

  He watched the female walk away from him and continued to do so until she was beyond his sight and amongst the foliage. The pounding noise that filled his ears as her steps receded was from his heart and he clenched his hand around his sword to re-exert control over his body.

  She healed Quist. To remind himself, he moved to his brother and checked his wound. A pang of remorse, painful guilt, stiffened his back as he eyed the zig-zagged sewed-together edges. It looked painful and he placed a hand on his own side in response.

  “I’m sorry,” he grunted out, not used to the words on his tongue. Sundamar grabbed additional foliage from the ground and reinforced the pillow Yahiro had made. So thoughtful. He sprinkled fresh cool water over Quist’s chest, his brother’s even breaths easing his heart.

  He had lost his head. The emotions streaming through him weren’t helping, and his battle with the strange, obsessive need to touch the female was constantly warring inside him. Sundamar had never in his long, dead life lifted a weapon against another light valos. He had also never wanted a female companion to hold under his arm. So many things were happening, suddenly and all at once, that it made him want to stab his sword into the dirt and kill the world.

  He glanced around him and looked at the destruction his frustration had caused; the dozens of trees, bushes, and various plants he had sliced to pieces. He was only thankful no alluvian valos were nearby to see. I’m more thankful I had an outlet that wasn’t her.

  Even now, staring at his brother, he wanted to go after the female and envelope her within his arms, press her into his chest, and bury his nose in her hair. The thought that Quist had done all of that possibly, and more, filled him with jealousy.

  He was the first, their commander, the one to lead them when Lusheenn was absent. It was his right to the first female light valos.

  Sundamar gritted his teeth and let the sick thoughts leave him. Once his temperament had calmed, he shuffled Quist’s wings so they were straight and uncrimped. When he was done, he sat back, not knowing what else to do.

  He looked up at the sky and cursed. Where are you, Galan? I need you. His thoughts shot out from him in hopes to connect to his second, but they didn’t and ended up in the void where all past thoughts were.

  Somewhere off in the distance he heard a splash of water. Yahiro was still close enough that he could get to her in case of an attack but as he looked away from his brother and toward the outcropping of undisturbed forest, his curiosity got the best of him.

  There’s nothing I can do but stare at Quist’s resting form. He knew nothing about healing, never having been hurt before. Sundamar trailed a finger along the stitched seams and wondered how the female thought to do that.

  An exasperated grunt sounded amongst the splashes and he found himself following the noise. For the first time in his life, he quieted his footsteps, not wanting the female to know he moved closer to her.

  What am I doing? It irked him how lowly she made him feel. I’m the image of Lusheenn. And yet he remained quiet, which was made all the more difficult with his armor.

  The female had her legs in the water, her feet submerged, and her trousers off. His eyes trailed over her lithe legs until they reached a strap of cloth around her groin. In her hands was the knife he’d given her and the orange material; she yanked the sharpened edge through it, cutting them in half.

  Sundamar canted his head and moved into a crouch. Her teeth dug into her lower lip as she struggled with the cloth but she eventually stopped and placed the cut-off material aside.

  After, she ran her hands over her legs and feet, scrubbing them until they were pink. He glanced down at his own skin, knowing the light bronze hue of it never changed colors regardless of weather or exposure. When he looked up the female had lifted her feet out of the water and had picked up a long stick, the top part of it pointed until it resembled a spear.

  He already knew he’d have to re-sharpen his dagger after finding the shaved chips of wood near the shore.

  Yahiro moved away from him and his gaze followed her shapely legs, his member protruding from between his legs and pressing painfully into the armored leather that protected it. The scrap of cloth between her legs was nearly see-through, dampened with water, and he could almost see what was between her legs as she moved back and forth along the shore.

  If he had been more patient, he may have had the sense to ask Quist what he knew of the female's anatomy.

  Instead, he’d lost control and now had to deal with observing her from the shadows. Sundamar tamped back the regret, knowing he may have been allowed to touch her if his jealousy hadn’t been so overwhelming. A new need arose in him as he observed her, and it took what little control he had left to remain where he was and not pull her into his arms and bind them together.

  His eyes narrowed when she stopped and slowly leaned over the water. What are you doing? He was fascinated and tried to crook his head so he could see what her eyes tracked so carefully.

  Yahiro raised the primitive spear before her and clasped it with both hands. A moment’s breath passed before she struck it into the water and struck it again immediately after, uttering a strange word.

  Hunting. He smiled and settled in for the show.

  Time passed and she tried again and again, every now and then storming back to Quist’s side to check on him, to tentatively scout around and look for him, before eventually going back to the water and spearing it. After a while he realized she was becoming more desperate, and yet he didn’t leave his hiding spot. He didn’t want to remind her he was there.

  If she would only call my name. Ask for help aloud... Sundamar would have made himself known.

  He wanted her to want him, needed her to look for him. He hated that, besides his brother’s quick revival, he wanted to consume her every thought.

  But whenever he made a move to rise and help her with her hunt when she was on the verge of giving up, she’d get right back up with a groan and go at it again.

  Call me, Yahiro. Remember I’m here now too. He envied Quist. Even when unconscious and undisturbed, he received her lips freely.

  Every time she threw her spear aside to check on his brother, she would place her lips over Quist’s, and every time she did it, Sundamar rubbed his own, wishing the female would search him out and do the same.

  She went to spear another phena and failed.

  “Fuck!” She released her weapon into the water and allowed it to float away as she dropped
to her knees and fell back onto the ground with a rattling sigh.

  He unclenched his hand and stepped quietly out of the gloom and went to her side. She startled when his shadow fell over her pinkened face and quickly sat up. He approached slowly, hoping not to startle her away, and watched as her brow crinkled and she leaned back.

  “Your eyes are hooded,” he murmured, staring into her eyes for the first time. Sundamar had never seen such cloudy, stormy eyes. “Why?”

  Her mouth twisted, opening and closing before she found her words. “I don’t trust you.”

  It felt like a hammer to his gut.

  “Why?” Sundamar kneeled so that he would be eye level with the female. His armor pressed into him in all the wrong places.

  “You almost killed Quist!”

  His jaw ticked. “Quist almost killed himself.”

  “So he picked up your sword and sawed into his side? I don’t think so. He wouldn’t be so stupid.”

  Any nervousness she might have had was now gone. She held his gaze unflinchingly. He pressed his fist into the soil. “He disobeyed his commander.”

  “You tried to take me away!”

  “I wasn’t going to hurt you!” His voice rose as he dug his fingers into the ground.

  “How was he supposed to know!? Quist promised to protect me!” she screamed, getting on her knees and pushing at his chest. His body didn’t move.

  “And I wouldn’t? I can protect you as well as he can! Better. I would be the better choice.” Sundamar barely heard his own words but felt the burn of them on his tongue.

  Yahiro turned her rolling eyes away from his, and he wanted to tear a tree limb from limb. I’m losing her. He reached out to take her hand but stopped himself. It went unnoticed as she lifted herself back to her feet and went after her spear. He followed her every move and hated the wariness in her gait.

  “Go away. I liked it better when you weren’t here.” Her voice was numb as she lifted her ridiculous weapon and failed to spear another phena.

  “I’ve been here the whole time protecting you, making sure you and my brother were safe. I’m your commander: you obey my orders, I don’t obey yours.”

  “Wow.” He didn’t understand the word. “Last time a man watched me without me knowing it, I destroyed him, but not before he took my life so completely that I ended up on an alien world. I’m going to be my own person now, and tell you I don’t obey any man. Not anymore.”

  His eyes narrowed, confused and angered by what she said. Another man watched her? Sundamar looked around before he convinced himself they were alone. Dead—dust... back into the void. Could the female have the power to do that? It was one thing to die by nature, another thing completely to be destroyed. Only a Creator had that kind of power.

  “I won’t take your life like this being had and send you away...”

  Yahiro shot him a look before turning away and stabbing the water over and over with her spear until it broke in half. She threw the remaining half away. “You already have!”

  Her yell rang in his ears and he stood. They came to a head and he reached out to touch her but she flitted away and grabbed the extra cloth from her pants before heading back through the tree line and toward Quist’s unconscious body.

  “I have?” he grunted to himself and pulled out his broadsword. His muscles bulged and twitched with the need to break something apart. Sundamar heard her tired, angry groans from far off behind him as he lifted his sword and took his frustration out on the land. He wanted to go to her. The pull inside his gut yanked him in her direction, but he pushed it down and did his best to ignore it.

  Her eyes had storms.

  The afternoon had come and gone by the time he stepped from the water with a pile of hacked up phena corpses in his arms. And as he headed back to Yahiro and his brother, the sweet smell of the female’s scent filled his nose.

  He dropped the offering at her side, watching her face and hoping that he had finally done something right.

  She lifted her head off of Quist’s chest, eyes lowered and glazed with sleep, and he realized he had woken her from a nap. When her gaze fell on the phena, a sad grumble sounded from within her belly. He sucked in a breath and went to check on his brother’s wound.

  Quist’s skin had all but knitted completely back together and the string that ran through was settling into his skin as if it belonged. Yahiro moved toward his offering without a word and he chose to keep his silence, his fingers tracing over the zig-zagging pattern of Quist’s wound in awe. His brother’s wings twitched and resettled onto the ground.

  “He’s gleaming.”

  Sundamar snapped his eyes up to see the female looking at Quist. The litany of her dialect soothed him. She’s looking at his sun piercings.

  “Quist always does in the light, more so when he’s happy.”

  “He’s happy?”

  “Yes. He must know you’re watching over him.”

  Her fingers trailed up and down the golden baubles over his neck and shoulder. His own skin prickled with the whispering touch. Sundamar tore his eyes away.

  “How?” she asked.

  “How? Because of the pull, the one that brought us together. He feels your nearness and it’s comforting him.” It’s how I feel. Her movements stopped for a moment before she continued. “Thank you for saving him,” he said at last.

  “I’m not sure if I have... He hasn’t woken yet and my stitching, it’s terrible. I’m praying it doesn’t get infected.”

  “He’ll wake soon and a simple wound from a blade won’t fester, only shadows do that. Look.” He pulled on the skin between Quist’s stitches, “It’s already mended.” Yahiro leaned toward him and he held still.

  A sigh escaped her lips. “I wish I healed like that.”

  “You don’t?”

  She shook her head, sending her long silken hair scattering over her shoulders. “A wound like that, without proper medicine and treatment, without the,” she stumbled over her words, “the conveniences of Earth would take weeks, maybe even months, if it didn’t kill me.”

  A sudden, sharp fear in him grew. “Yahiro—”

  “—why did you grab me anyway?”

  He looked over her shoulder and sighed. “My arms wanted to be around you.”

  There was a long pause before she answered him. “I’m with Quist.”

  “You’re with both of us,” he hissed between his teeth. So many shadowed emotions! “Galan too.”

  “No. I’m not.” She looked up and held his eyes.

  “Then you don’t feel the tug in your chest, the one that’s clawing at you from the inside out to be near me too? Because that’s what I feel, it’s what Quist feels, and Galan. We glimpsed you, several dawns back. It was crushing—that immediate feeling—seeing you through Quist’s eyes and being so far away. Don’t deny me.” He reached for her and the moment the pads of his fingers touched hers, she jerked away.

  “Don’t!” she gasped and crawled back a few steps. “Please. I’m not a valos. I’m not even supposed to be here! Whatever this is—” she waved between all three of them “—is wrong.”

  Don’t deny me.

  ‘She’s not.’ Sundamar startled and looked at Quist.

  ‘You’re awake?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘You shouldn’t have denied me.’ It was as close to an apology as he would give his third.

  ‘Look at her. You know I’m right. She’s not safe on the ground. I can feel the sun fading already, my skin isn’t as warm and my blood...’

  Sundamar sucked in a deep breath, inhaling the tangy scent even though it had been diluted by water and multiple scrubbings. Many of Sonhadra’s predators could smell blood from leagues away, even if it was only several drops.

  He reached for his sword, suddenly feeling the shadows under his feet.

  “What’re you doing?” Yahiro watched him warily.

  “We need to move.” He stood and checked the sky, the sun already on its way toward dusk.
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br />   “Why?” Yahiro rose with him and looked up where he had. “Is something wrong?”

  “Ak’rena are coming.” Sundamar went about their camp and retrieved any wayward items.

  “Those... those are the monsters that screech?”

  “What’s a monster? Yes, the ak’rena screech.” He turned back toward her. “Can you travel? Are you hurt at all? Is there anything you need before we leave this spot?” I have no idea what you need. He waited for her response with apprehension and frustration. He hated that he didn’t know how to provide for her.

  Yahiro looked down at herself, at Quist, and frowned. “Only him. I won’t leave without him.”

  Sundamar felt his lips twitch up into a tiny smirk. ‘This is going to hurt, brother.’ He folded Quist’s wings in and hefted his body into his arms, cradling what he could. Feathers fell around him in trickling waves.

  “Stay close.”

  She stepped close to his side and gripped his armor. He wished he could feel her skin touch his. He wished he was holding her in his arms rather than his third.

  “Yes, sir,” Yahiro whispered at his side, her heart pounding loud enough for him to hear. Sundamar canted his head toward her.

  “You’re safe with me, pale one. The ak’rena are night prowlers and there is time yet, but once the lower light and twilight haze cover the land, they’ll awaken and come straight here, brought on by the bloodshed of this morning. I won’t risk you.”

  Her grey eyes met his. “Promise?” she whispered.

  “Promise?”

  She latched onto him tighter. “Oath?”

  Sundamar narrowed his eyes and nodded. “It’s an oath.”

  Chapter Nine

  GALAN

  He gathered every gun from the temple he could find and piled them into a corner well away from the humans. Some of them he kept for himself, strapping them into a gun belt he was given by one of the males. He didn’t like the feel of them on his body but since his bow had vanished, and with it, his arrows, he had little choice. His aim was perfected by countless dawns and shooting a gun gave him no issue now.